When I was little, I used to think:
1. I want to be a professional dancer, like those ballerinas in the Nutcracker.
2. I want to date every single man in the whole wide world so I can pick out just the right one for me. (ugh..why???)
3. I want to live in the Temple so that I would never ever have to be tempted--I could be happy and perfect all the time. What a better place to live, it would be like being in Heaven all the time.
4. My dad is the tallest guy in the world, and the strongest, and would protect me from anything.
5. My mom can make anything all better. Anything!
6. The song "Butterfly Kisses" made me cry because it would mean my dad would be sad cause he had to give me away.
7. Snails were fun to play with, and sweet creatures that no one should destroy because they were nice and never hurt anyone and they were pretty and they did cool things with their antennaes--just because they are slow doesn't mean they should be killed.
8. ..that if I believed in something so strongly, then everyone else would believe in it, too.
9. ...that I was the coolest kid in school..until I got to first grade. ha
10. that Santa was real, and that he wrote me letters every Christmastime, and that he read my Naughty and Nice list every year, and that the reindeers came and ate up all the carrots we left them. (haha thanks Dad)
11. That my grandma was an angel.
12. That when other kids were mean to me, I could just go off and be on my own and it didn't matter because I didn't need any friends anyways. So I played with the snails. haha
13. That there was a perfect plan for each one of us and that when you grew up everything turned out just right and everyone was happy all the time because they were a grown up.
Now, well, I've had enough dating of even a very small percentage of one little town in the state of Utah in the United States to last a lifetime...
Now sometimes my shining eyes are a little bit dulled by experiences that may have bittered them a little...
Now sometimes I dont even know what I want to be when I "grow up"
...Yet now I appreciate my imperfect parents even more, now I realize that things really DO come out for the best in the long run if we keep holding onto those glimmers of light that come and go, I actually DO get to live in the temple for about 5 hours a week plus :) , my grandma really is an angel sent to earth. And no, one of my parents does NOT believe everything I believe in, in fact, I can't even talk to him about it, but that just goes along with respecting and learning to love others. And speaking of others, I'm learning just how grateful I am that I am not alone, that I do have family and friends I can depend on, and how much we all need that.
Why do we let our grown-up negative experiences dull our ability to recognize all the good stuff that is really happening to us?
I got to hear President Henry B. Eyering (First Presidency for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints) speak this past Sunday, and it felt like he was talking to me. In fact, he looked at me a few times, and at one point we both started to tear up at the same time-while he was looking at me-it was really touching. But he basically left us his blessing, stating he felt it was really truly from the Lord, that if we keep on being faithful, that those things, any of those eternally important things, that are promised to us will in fact come, maybe not when we expect it, but that they will, because God doesn't break His promises. He left us with a blessing of that "peace that passeth all understanding, as long as you open your eyes and see those glimmers of light."
Oh man Im just tearing up thinking about it, but what a blessing this life is, and I am so grateful for living Apostles and Prophets who testify of Christ, who remind us of why we are here, and who help us to keep at it and not forget Him.
