So today I was on the unit at work all day for the first time. It was going pretty well until the afternoon! This one patient, who was telling me how great I was earlier in the day, started yelling at me, saying that my eyes were coming out of their sockets, that I was an alien (which was kind of funny in all honesty)--but then she proceeded to pick on me about physical things that I am already extremely sensitive about--it was really, really hard to just sit there and listen to her. I couldn't say anything because she is a patient, and obviously not in her right mind--not only that but when people start to verbally abuse me I just clam up and don't know how to say anything back--whether they are right in the head or not. Just brings back a lot of really bad memories and feelings associated with those memories and experiences that lasted for a good portion of my life--I kinda shut down and get into my own little world. Ugh! Maybe that is too personal to say on a blog, if so I am really sorry. This job is really, really hard. I dont know if I can take it--maybe it will be a good chance for me to learn how to deal with past demons and move forward--I'm just gonna have to keep praying to get through every day! AH!
2 comments:
Well, I think you are beautiful!
There are things nobody should say to women and that is one of them. Unless your extremely sensitive about how good you look, I can't think of anything she could have said. Guess that's why she's in a mental institution and I'm not. Hopefully you have a bunch of awesome days to make up for it!
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