My Life at the Utah State Hospital...

On one of many watches....and that is a patient bed.  They are bolted to the floor and equipped with holes in the sides to hook restraints to, if needed.  Don't worry, they do get a mattress...its basically a dense piece of foam covered in vinyl.  They are pretty sturdy, dont worry. :) 

Ha!  One of the girls painted my fingers....I think she was intending to make them look as crazy as possible....

Sometimes it gets a little bit boring and you have to do whatever necessary to stay awake....haha

And sometimes this just happens!!

Low speed limits for safety, you never know what patients are going to do!

Sometimes we get to go on fun field trips!  This was from the Colonial Days thing in downtown Provo.  Pretty cool!

I just loved this saying from the minute I saw it.  It's liberating to the patients, and really to all of us, to realize that we are who we are, and if we can just accept it and rejoice in it, the whole world belongs to us. :)  

Well, I don't take many pictures at work, because obviously I can't due to patient privacy...but maybe I'll try to get some more and show ya!  (anything legal, that is ha)

To Do in the Next Few Years....

Alright!  To Do:

*Get RN degree

*Get a PhD in Family Studies/Family Therapy

*Become a virtuoso clarinetist--one of those people who, when people listen, they get sucked in and say "oh my gosh..oh my freakin gosh...that was freakin AMAZING!"

*Travel all over the world

*Make a lot of money so I CAN travel all over the world...

*Get a Master's degree...

*Learn Italian

*Learn Spanish

*Um...find my future man and have a family

*Be the most amazing mom ever....not comparatively, just, most amazing to my husband and kids and to the Lord

*Build a wonderful family life

*Be healthy, eat lots of vegetables and fruits and whole grains and salmon..yum

*save up to move home to California in April

*Keep up with all of my family members and their lives and be a good influence and a good sister and a good cousin and a good niece and good granddaughter and good daughter.....

*Get a motorcycle license

*Get a new car

*Always be reading a good book

Sometimes I wonder how I am going to get all this done in the next few years.....

Life is so short, so very short, and I think sometimes about all the things I want to DO with my life, and it gets a little bit overwhelming, because I have all these desires, and while I am alive and here living, I want to experience so many things, learn everything there is to learn, and then when I am trying to learn something and it doesn't come quickly, I get discouraged--either that, or I get mediocre at that one thing I'm trying to learn, and then move on to something else instead of cultivating that one thing.  Do you ever do that?  And then I get impatient, thinking, Well, I have so much I want to do, I need to move on to the next thing!  What has happened to my stick-to-it-ness, like I had in my youth?  I used to spend all my time cultivating talents, learning, doing homework, etc., and then when I become an adult, I realize how imbalanced my life was as a child, and I try to do lots MORE things......and yet, I lack that characteristic that enabled me to break things down more and more and focus and develop, and then develop more in that one groove of life, and enjoy the depth and breadth of that particular groove.  

I mean, think about it.  I graduated TWO years ago.  TWO!  And what have I done since?  Well.....lets see..I worked as a custodian...I dated one guy....wait, one and a half.....I worked as a waitress.....I DID take the GRE at least.....Where did time go?  And when I start raising a family, will I even have the time to keep on learning and experiencing life?  

Oh my gosh...maybe I've hit the wild years of my life!  I'm a self-centered, non-committal, young single adult who is sowing my wild oats!!!  GASPPP!!!!!  AND LIFE WILL END IF I HAVE A FAMILY!!!!  (just kidding....? sort of?? oh NO!!!) Maybe I'm scared of that!  Maybe, just maybe, I have this awful deep-down idea that having a family will suck my very life away...and that I will become boring and dull and always stuck in a rut and get frumpy and grumpy and my husband will just despise me after ten years.......OH NOOO!!!

Do you ever feel like that?  Maybe I just have my priorities out of whack....lol

Just a thought for the day :)  

Music and Hauntings....

Well, more like I GOT MY CLARINET AND IM SO EXCITED!!!!...and we had our Ward Halloween Party, which was surprisingly really, really fun, very well planned, and everyone that came had a very creative costume!  I'm not even exaggerating.  

Thats me on the left...that wig is ridiculous (and four bucks from Savers) but just try to guess what I am...and then there's Kleresa in the middle (her mom made that flapper costume...it was really, really cute!  She looks gorgeous!)  and Shantel on the right in the red skirt.  (Can you guess who they are??)  

(caution...some graphic images below!)

(somehow this doesn't surprise me coming from Brett..ha)

It was supposed to be a "date" activity, which I think was a great idea, because we all had our costumes in pairs.  There was little bo beep and her sheep, Sid from Toy Story and a mangled toy, two teddy bears, a pair of angels, two crayons of different colors, two hippies with home made tye-died outfits from head to foot,  an "anti-prohibitionist" and his girl...I could go on!  It was amazing. In order to choose a date, we did not do the traditional "will you go to the dance with me" thing, oh no.  The guys put a tie in a giant bucket, and the Activities Committee went around with the bucket and had the girls pick an anonymous tie.  And that was the young man we paired up with.  Creative! 

The party turned into a huge dance, and we were all squished into the corner of the room dancing our little hearts out. I wished my date enjoyed dancing, but he didn't, and so he just sat on the couch with another guy who didn't like dancing while a bunch of people stood up and played.  I felt kind of bad for leaving him there, sorry Jordan.....I think he was happy to go when I said I had to get up early...

We created graham-cracker houses with neon frosting and candy and graham crackers, we colored spooky-ish halloween pictures, and ate some delicious food...shhh dont tell Carriage Cove.....

Anyway, I hope you all are having a great Halloween and enjoying all the fun.  :)  May you rest in peace tonight...

Fall Colors!

I went on a bikeride through the Provo River Trail today....Sorry Dallen don't kill me...ha...but anyways, here you go!  I wish I would have gone about 3 weeks earlier when the colors were brighter, but they are still gorgeous!  Enjoy! (PS these are totally not tampered with, just straight from the camera!) 

I'm going to miss this about Provo!  :)  

Attacked by Bears

..Yeah. I thought you would want to read the post on being attacked by BEARS!

It really did happen!  (Well, I was sleeping....) but I'll tell you the story.  So somewhere between the hours of 4-5 this morning, right before I woke up, I was walking down this long driveway in front of a beautifully lit, warm, happy house where we were having some kind of a ward party.  There were quite a few cars circling the driveway, and oddly enough, I saw three guys from my ward standing there, frozen in midair as though they had been laughing and jumping around--but their eyes moved, and when I looked at their eyes, that were giving me a big warning, I moved my glance towards the direction they were eyeballing me towards.  And what did I see?  A big, tan-colored BEAR standing in front of them, apparently oblivious of their existence since they were being perfectly still.  I decided that while this bear was busy picking flowers by the driveway's edge, I would turn around and bolt it to my car, where I could drive away quickly and safely.  As I was about to turn around, it was as though the bear read my thoughts!  It stood up on its hind legs and made itself as tall as possible.  My superhuman dream-running came into play and all of a sudden I was locked in my car, seatbelt on, and being pushed from side to side by this monster bear as I lead-footed the gas.  (pulse pounding, breath getting faster by the minute, but I could definitely outsmart this bear.)

I raced and roared my engine, almost got flipped over, and sped through the trees.  Somehow, at this moment, I thought I had lost the bear.  Because it's a dream--correct me, an action movie--playing out in my mind, I have to go rescue other people that might be in danger.  I sped back to the house, got out of my car, got to the door of the house, panging and sweating, and told the first two guys I saw sitting there--my roommates study group guys that were at my house last night.  And for some reason they were my hometeachers....Anyway....

They got up instantly, in their white button up shirts, and right about now the bear shows up again, as I speed-race it back to my car.  They hold the bear off as they work together.....and they were about to get torn apart! Then it was up to me, my heart was racing, adrenallaine pumping, sweat stinging (not to be confused with stinking)  my eyes, (and at this point I was wearing my x-men halloween costume), and I woke UP!

(gasp......gasp....gasp....gasp..........)

I'm still stressed out.  Whew!

ALERT! ALERT! ALERT!

My apartment complex has been having several robberies lately!  So scary!!!  Enough crime has been going on that we received the following notification on our door two days ago:

  

Isn't that scary?  So for the last couple of days I've been on pins and needles keeping the doors locked (I usually do anyways, but when I find its unlocked when my roommates are home, I get really nervous!)  

This morning, I found ANOTHER note on the door from Management.....

HA!!  Seriously, that made my day.  I was laughing, outside, almost the middle of the night for normal people at 6:15 in the morning, standing on my doorstep, and all the way to my car, and then for like an hour afterwards.  Thank you, management, for such a great announcement!!

It's Been Awhile....

So for catchup, catch-up??  Ketchup.  No......

Anyways.  What is new, well....

1.  I learned some new Italian words this week, and I've been very productive in learning them. And by very productive I mean while I was on a watch for twenty minutes I studied them......

2.  My friend Sara is going to nanny in Italy. How cool is that??!! Maybe thats what I will do to travel!!!

3.  I reminisced so much into my childhood and talked so much about talents in my Institute class the past couple of weeks that I have sent in for my very own brand new Buffet Bb E12 Clarinet!!!  Oh I am soo excited, its disgusting.  

4.  While reminiscing, and debating what to do with my life, I have added two new thoughts:  Become an RN, OR...go back to school and study BIOLOGY! It was by far my favorite subject not only in high school, but my favorite GE class...besides MFHD of course.  And why, praytell, would someone subject themselves to biology?  Well, its cool, for one, and for two, I have a very inquisitive and scientific mind, and thus, feel that research is a great field for me.  Nerd?  yes.  But I DO have a good taste in shoes, at least.

5.  I got the best compliment that just made my whole day, by this guy in my ward who works at the Provo temple cafeteria on the night I work at the temple.  He was walking by the recommend desk, he sees me, and he says "HELLO!! MAN you look good in white!!" Then he turns to the recommend desk guys (who know him pretty well, he's so friendly) and says "You have some BEAUTIFUL workers here, you know that??"  Ha.  OK so he talks to every female like this, but nevertheless, it made my day.

6.  I spent conference weekend with the Millers, and that was a blast. I love their family and had so much fun hanging out with such a down to earth and sweet spirited family.  It's crazy how just being in a home, a real home, can alter your mindset and take away lots of stress! Thank you, Millers!!  I am so amazed--I cant even describe the words--maybe its more of a humble feeling, that our Prophet and our Apostles always remind us to work on the day to day things that bring us closer to the Lord, instead of expecting us to do some huge things--and when I think about the small things, they really add up to be huge things--they are the hardest things, really.  Because I don't know about you, though I read my scriptures daily and say my prayers daily, because they are so daily, which they SHOULD be, I so easily become comfortable and don't actually BECOME better, and I know I can do a lot better.  They remind us to keep trying, to keep trusting the Lord, and to remember Him every day.  I'm so grateful that we have modern day revelation and truth.  It really is truth.  I can feel it--deep down.  And if you wanna hear what the Prophet and the Apostles, regular guys but servants and mouthpieces of the Lord today,  have to say, just go here: General Conference

  

7.  Me and my friend Alicia want to apply for the Amazing Race!  Talk about AWESOME!! Oh that would solve all my desires to travel the world, experience cultures, and do something incredibly fun and huge!!!

We need ideas on making a video!! If you think of any good ones let me know!! :)  

I can't think of anything else at the moment, but you have a great day, you hear now?  I did have something amazing earlier (or so i thought, bahaha) ..but it has left my head....so this will suffice.  Adios!!