Lessons Learned and Hopefully More to Learn!

Well, the last week or so has been a humbling experience for sure.

I've been doing a lot of thinking in my moments where I wonder why David would feel like things weren't right, and I can't really come to any good conclusions at the moment, but at least I have been learning a lot about myself and relationships.

For one, I have been thinking how I am 25..almost.. ;) and so far my life is definitely not where I have planned it to be. I mean, I am not going to grad school like I planned, I am working as a custodian lol, I am still living in Provo as a single girl....I honestly thought that it was just the right time for me to move on with my life and that David was that blessing for me.

Well, the Lord always has different things in mind for us I suppose than we have for ourselves, I can say that I believe David was sent into my life for a purpose. I had gotten to a point spiritually where I wasn't really trying anymore--I had become complaicent and I wasn't really pushing myself to become better. I was losing hope and my faith was slipping in me one day having someone in my life. I was sitting around wishing....actually I had stopped wishing...and I had given up on actually doing.

David is one of those people who gets an idea in his head and he goes for it. He inspired me to push myself to become better. He isn't someone that just lets life pass him by, but he is always working hard for something, and is willing to sacrifice a great deal for things that he feels are important. He keeps the Lord first in his life. He doesn't fall into the world's ways of just always going with the flow--but he is always aware of the choices he is making and he is very careful to choose the best.

Relationship-wise, he taught me to see what a guy SHOULD have to make a relationship work. For example, David was GREAT at communicating. I never questioned where he stood I am horrible at it, so I realized that I need someone who is willing to take the initiative in that. David is also great at putting his girl as a priority. I have never been treated with so much care--I felt like a princess! He even used to come by my apartment early in the morning and scrape all the snow and ice off my windows. Then he would leave a little note! How thoughtful. That is something I HATE to do in the winter--scrape off the ice and snow. :) Not only that, but he always keeps the Lord first, and that is definitely one of the most important things that we can do in relationships!

Another blessing he was to me was to remind me that I am worth being treated well and that I am worth being loved. I think I had come to a point where I had given up on dating and was perfectly happy living my little life and doing whatever I wanted to do whenever I wanted to do it. The Lord was reminding me that there is something much sweeter--caring for another person, and being cared about by another person. Now I am thinking how much I miss that--being cared about. I am not used to someone loving me so much--someone outside of my family of course. :) He really would have done anything for me. And he wasn't going to go anywhere no matter how stubborn I was--which is pretty hard to find a guy who is willing to do that haha.....I guess I had started to believe that all the other girls around were more special or more cute or that I had some serious lessons to learn before I could be loved.....he also made me realize I could just be me and not have to hide myself because if I was truly my whole self then I would "scare the boys away!" David always wanted me to open up and to just be who I was. I must say I didn't quite accomplish that, letting go of my walls completely, but at least I saw more of how being myself is good, but we are still friends and I hope we can stay that way. I really am so grateful that he was following what the Lord wanted him to do. So grateful!

So, regardless of this week being one of those downers, it isn't truly a downer because I feel like I've been more humbled and teachable, I have felt like the Lord is giving me comfort and peace, and I am truly grateful for the things that I learned and the friend I gained, and he taught me so much! :) I hope I can change the things about myself that need refining. I hope I can keep on learning ! :) And I hope that I can always have a good friend from this experience! :)